I sat down amongst the other women with the weight of motherhood pressing me into the chair. I looked around and everyone appeared to be happy, with friends, and seemingly had it all together. I was exhausted and so weary from the last few weeks not sure I could stay awake for the talk. Everyone talked about how excited they were to be there and participate in the event when in reality I came because two hours of free childcare was offered.
I grabbed my coffee and sat back down just settling in to my own time of "quiet." No one crying, no one needing to be fed, no one needing re-direction for the 100th time, and no one fussing. Just me and my coffee in a sea of women who I couldn't measure up to as a mother. Surely they have it all together, they look so happy and put together with make-up and coordinating jewelry/shoes. I didn't even think of coordinating; I just needed to get out the door so I could drop her off and sit at this table for two hours.
I really don't remember what the talk was about that day but I do remember three profound words that were spoken. "He chose you." The speaker went on to encourage that God chose me for these children of mine, on purpose. He knew exactly the Momma they needed and He chose me. Now, I am sure you have heard this before but that particular day, these words soothed my hurting soul. I was feeling so un-motherly, so weary and worn from the push to just finish the day. With her words I felt God's smile of approval and I immediately had the thought, "He trusts me."
He trusts me when I am weary and at my wits end. He trusts me when the strong willed one seems to baffle me more than pull at my heart strings. He trusts me even when I don't know how to soothe my children. He trusts me when I feel like I'm sinking in piles of bottles and diapers and laundry. He trusts me even when I don't.
The truth is, He knew exactly the Momma my children needed and He hand pick you and me for this time. No other woman on the face of the earth would do. And I have settled in the truth, He trusts me.
Tracie Moss is a wife, mother, military wife, speech pathologist, speaker, and friend. She lives in Southern California and enjoys spending time with her husband Kevin, daughters Emma and Ashley, son-in-law John, and grandchildren Coleman and Gracie. She is passionate about living life to the fullest. You can find her at Living Well Ministries.